100th post--More Gifts

This is my 100th post. I’ve tried to decide what “100” things I’d like to write. I’m not really that good at “100 things about you” type thing. But it is also Thursday which is my 1000 Gifts day. So today I’m going to offer 100 Scriptures that I consider gifts. They are special to me for a variety of reasons. I’m giving the text only, so you’ll have to get out your Bibles and go for it (or go to www.biblegateway.com) to look them up). I’d encourage you to look at the context of the verse as well. I certainly don’t want to be accused of proof-texting. Finally, I’m listing them as 1-100 and they are in no particular order except how I thought of them today but for the 1000 gifts list they are 176-275. Blessings to all of you!

1. A future that is planned by God (Jeremiah 29:11-12)
2. A God who hears my prayers (see again Jeremiah 29:11-12)
3. Godly mentors (Titus 2:4-5)
4. Freedom (Gal. 5:1,13)
5. Discipline (Hebrews 12:7-11)
6. Adversity (Romans 8:28)
7. Arrows in my Quiver (Psalm 127:4-5)
8. Eternal Life (Romans 6:23)
9. God’s attention to detail in my life (Matthew 10:30-31)
10. Peace with God (Romans 5:1-2)
11. Wisdom (Proverbs 13:20, Proverbs 9:10)
12. Knowledge (Proverbs 15:14)
13. Mercy (Psalm 23:6)
14. Lullabies and victory songs sung by God (Zephaniah 3:17)
15. Instruction for Life (Micah 6:8)
16. Love (1 Corinthians 13)
17. More instruction for Life (Matthew 22:37-39; Luke 10:26-28)
18. Even more instruction for Life (1 Samuel 15:22)
19. Gifts of the Spirit (1 Corinthians 12)
20. Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23)
21. My Weakness (2 Corinthians 12:10)
22. Inspired Word of God (2 Timothy 3:16)
23. The Communion Table (Luke 22:17-20)
24. Death is Conquered! (Matthew 27:50; Mark 15:36, Luke 23:46, John 19:30)
25. RESURRECTION! (Matthew 28:6, Mark 16:6, Luke 24:6)
26. Restoration (John 21:17)
27. Appearance to Mary Magdalene (John 20:18)
28. Persistent Prayer (Luke 18:1-8)
29. A Cloud of Witnesses (Hebrews 12:1)
30. Heroes of the Faith to encourage us (Hebrews 11)
31. Trust when don’t know how to Pray (2 Chronicles 20:6-12)
32. Pierce my ear and my heart (Exodus 21:6)
33. My Standards of Judgment (Matthew 7:2)
34. No fear of evil (Psalm 23:4)
35. Days in God’s Presence (Psalm 27:4)
36. Flawless Words of God (Psalm 18:30)
37. Lost Sons and Daughters are Welcomed Home (Luke 15:10-24)
38. The Image of God in Me (Genesis 1:27)
39. Deep Roots (Psalm 1:3)
40. Instruction for Marriage (Proverbs 21:9)
41. More instruction for marriage (Proverbs 12:4)
42. And more instruction for marriage (Ephesians 5:22-24, 33)
43. Instructions for parenting (Ephesians 6:4)
44. More instruction for parenting (Colossians 3:21)
45. And yet more instruction for parenting (Proverbs 22:6)
46. Renewed Strength (Isaiah 40:31)
47. A Child is Born/Immanuel (Isaiah 9:6-7; Matthew 1:23)
48. New mercy every morning (Lamentations 3:22-24)
49. The harvest (John 4:35)
50. To be a harvester (Luke 10:1-3)
51. Little children in Jesus arms (Matthew 19:130
52. To lift Holy Hands (1 Timothy 2:8)
53. A Comforter (John 14:26)
54. A Commission (Matthew 28:19-20)
55. A good deposit (1 Timothy 1:14)
56. A Returning Savior (John 14:1-4)
57. A room for me in heaven (see again John 14:1-4)
58. A Cornerstone (Isaiah 28:16)
59. Worship (Revelation 5:12-14)
60. Justice (Amos 5:24)
61. Higher Thoughts (Isaiah 55:9)
62. Salvation (John 3:16)
63. A Kingdom to Seek (Matthew 6:33)
64. A Clean Heart (Psalm 51:10)
65. The (ONLY) Way (John 14:6)
66. Bread of Life (John 6:51)
67. Daily Bread (Luke 11:3; Matthew 6:11)
68. Loving each other (1 John 3:11-14)
69. More on loving each other (1 John 4:7)
70. Walk in the Light (1 John 1:6-7)
71. All will Confess Jesus (Philippians 2:10-11)
72. Confession (Romans 10:9)
73. Confession of Sin (James 5:16)
74. Strength for Today (Philippians 4:13)
75. No Anxiety (Philippians 4:6)
76. Mountains are delivered (Joshua 14:6-14)
77. Faith of a Mustard Seed (Luke 17:6)
78. A God who hears prayers (Psalm 116:1-2)
79. Better is One Day (Psalm 84:10)
80. Heart Meditations (Psalm 19:14)
81. Exaltation (Isaiah 25:1)
82. Running the race (1 Corinthians 9:24-25)
83. Faith and Deeds (James 2:14)
84. Words (Proverbs 16:24)
85. Teaching children (Deuteronomy 11:18-20)
86. Wedding verses (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
87. Blessing Verses (1 Samuel 1:27)
88. Quickness of the Coming (1 Thesselonians 5:1-3)
89. One Purpose (1 Corinthians 3:7-9)
90. Treasure (Luke 12:34)
91. Hospitality (1 Peter 4:9)
92. Handiwork (Proverbs 31:13, 22)
93. A crown (Revelation 3:11-12; 4:10-11)
94. By His Spirit (Zechariah 4:6)
95. Hinds Feet (Habbakuk 3:18-19)
96. Thankfulness (Psalm 105:1)
97. No longer Deserted (Isaiah 62:2-4)
98. Contentment (Philippians 4:12)
99. Benediction #1 (Numbers 6:24-26)
100. Benediction #2 (Jude 24-25)

Please add your favorite verses in the Comments! Thanks for reading this far!

What kind of day are you?

The description works, but I would prefer not to see many sunrises (I like to start a little later, lol). Thanks GB for the link.

You Are Sunrise

You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary. You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward. Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts. All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be.

What Time Of Day Are You?

IOW--Storytelling

This week's In Other Words is being hosted by Loni at Joy in the Morning Please join us there.

"God has delivered us, He has parted waters for us, He has made water gush forth from rocks and sent us our own manna from heaven. He has brought us into our own Promised Land. Will I miss the opportunity to tell the story to our children?"
~Ann Voskamp, Holy Experience~

My paternal grandfather (Pap-paw) was a storyteller. His stories could last for hours. Stories about traveling from Texas to Nashville. Stories about the Grand Ole Opry. Stories about farming, about my dad's and my uncle's mischief, about storms he had seen, about just about everything. Everything except how God was a part of his life. Don't get me wrong, his life showed in every way that God was a part of his life. But he didn't tell the stories. And I wish he had. I know from my grandmother and my aunt that Pap-paw went through a long period of total disillusionment with the church. He came back during a revival service week soon after I was born. So the grandfather I knew was different than the man my Dad knew in his growing up years. I'd love to have heard the stories of why, how, and when did God start wooing him back. Second-hand reports are that the change was dramatic. Did he think it was? I'll never know. I'm thankful for the story his life told--loving his family, commitment to his church, integrity in his business dealings, acceptance of people. But as I am able to tell some of his adventure stories, I wish I could tell his Jesus-story as well.

I believe that there is a lesson here. To verbally and intentionally tell the stories. To pass to our children a purposeful story of faith. Sure, we must live it and mirror it, but we also need to say it. I want Jewel and Flower to know God not just because I take them to church, introduce them to Godly people, read Bible stories to them and teach them verses. I want them to know God because they know that I know God and He has proven faithful in my life. I want them to have seen it and heard it daily to the point that when God woos their hearts and calls them to follow Him, they know it is His voice and that it is real. And if I don't tell them the stories, how will they know?

What will the stories be? In part the story of how Daddy and Mommy met in a church in Washington, how God provided a job in Alabama (and then later in England), how God blessed us with the birth of two lovely little girls long after we had decided we were not able to be parents, how God provided for us when it was time to leave a job and the new job had not been offered. Those are some of the stories. There will be more. And I need to commit now to be faithful to tell the stories, to make faith real and alive for my children until the day that they start telling their own stories. What a great day that will be!

"I love to tell the story
Of unseen things above,
Of Jesus and his glory,
Of Jesus and his love:
I love to tell the story
Because I know 'tis true;
It satisfies my longings
As nothing else can do.

I love to tell the story,
'Twill be my theme in glory
To tell the old, old story
of Jesus and His love.

I love to tell the story;
'Tis pleasant to repeat
What seems each time I tell it,
More wonderfully sweet:
I love to tell the story,
For some have never heard
The message of salvation
From God's own holy Word.

I love to tell the story,
'Twill be my theme in glory
To tell the old, old story
of Jesus and His love.

I love to tell the story;
For those who know it best
Seem hungering and thirsting
To hear it, like the rest:
And when, in scenes of glory,
I sing the new, new song,
'Twill be the old, old story
That I have loved so long.

I love to tell the story,
'Twill be my theme in glory
To tell the old, old story
of Jesus and His love."
~words by Katherine Hankey, 1866

Monday Menu

Monday: Pasta and tomato sauce with salad (just kids and I)
Tuesday: Chef's salads and garlic bread (just kids and I)
Wednesday: Ham Roll-ups and chips (Bible Study night)
Thursday: Taggliatelli and pork with marscapone cheese, salads, corn
Friday: Baked Trout, Steamed carrots, salad
Saturday: Decca's Chicken, Drunkard Style (from Maya Angelou's Hallelujah the Welcome Table), baked potatoes, green beans
Sunday: Navy Bean and Ham soup, Homemade Bread in the bread machine

Anniversary

Just a note to regular readers: I have been struggling with what to call my husband in these posts that gives him an identity while keeping privacy (which is important to him). He suggested I use the nickname “German” because it tells something of his background. So from this day forward, German he will be.


It was the week before Thanksgiving, 1994. I was at the church for our annual family Thanksgiving meal. As I walked down the hallway, I heard this conversation:
S: I think they are
A: I don’t think so
S: I’m pretty sure they are
A: Well here she is let’s just ask…”[Mipa] are you and German dating?”
Me (quite incredulously): Dating? No we are just friends.

I had not really given any thought to dating German. We were the only single people our age in the little church and we liked each other’s company (plus we both kept getting invited to the same things at the pastor’s house, a deacon’s home, etc. etc.) Hmmm…

It’s Thanksgiving day. I’ve ridden along with German and his brother as we travel to our Pastor’s Sister-in-law’s home for Thanksgiving. It is a long trip from Spokane to Missoula. Lots of time to get to know each other better while his brother naps in the back seat.

It’s Christmas time. I’m staying in Spokane. German is in St. Louis with his friends. We talk on the phone every night. Unbeknownst to me he is trying to change his flights so he can come back to Spokane for New Years. He gets the call from the airlines that his flight is changed.

It’s December 30. My grandmother just died. I call him to say I’m flying to Texas. He was packing to come home.

It’s January 4, 1995. He collects me at the airport when I come home to Spokane. We spend hours just driving. By the end of the week we have begun planning our life together, decided maybe we should actually go on a date if we can see forever in our future, and went our first date eagle watching in Coeur d’Alene. Quite a change from the person he first heard speak at church who said “I’m single by calling and by choice.” And I was. But God called me to something even better.

It’s Father’s Day, 1995. He officially proposes on top of Mount Spokane.

And 11 years ago today, I became his wife. I love you sweetheart! I can’t wait to see what else God has planned for us!

What a perfect evening

We had the best Thanksgiving! The tables were set:
and
The buffet was laid out on the cabinet:
The fellowship was amazing. I have not laughed so hard in ages. We had a wonderful time and were able to send lots of food home with everyone that came. Thanks my friends for a perfect Thanksgiving. Here is a shot of all of us, and then a cropped close-up of our family.

Happy Thanksgiving

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

I love Thanksgiving. At my house growing up it was bigger than Christmas. We would always go to my maternal grandmother's house. My brother and I would watch the parades while she basted the turkey, made the cornbread dressing and all the "fixins". Her sister would arrive with her family (her 3 children, their spouses, and collectively their 7 children). The house would be filled with the sounds of young cousins giggling, older cousins catching up on the gossip, and sisters laughing in the kitchen. No one could laugh like my Ma and Aunt Ene. (oh I miss hearing that laughter!) The men (my Dad and my Grandaddy and sometimes the hired help if they were single men) would come in from the fields since cotton harvest was often still going on. We would all sit down to eat. More food than was needed to feed a small nation. We were blessed. If the fields could wait all the guys would head out to hunt quail (this would be tomorrow's dinner instead of leftovers if we were lucky). Late into the evening aunt and uncle and all the cousins would pile into their cars to head home. We didn't do anything extraordinary, we just gathered and shared and gave thanks. And in my mind that is how Thanksgiving is supposed to be.

My husband and I live thousands of miles from *home* now. It's not even a holiday here in England (my DH has been at work since 730 and won't get home until after 6). My grandparents and their siblings are gone. The cousins have dispersed across the country. But I still long for those huge family gatherings. So tonight our house will be filled. Our pastor and his wife, his two grown daughters, his son-in-law and (maybe?)son-in-law to be, his two grandchildren, our youth minister and his wife and his three children will join my family for a traditional Thanksgiving dinner. And we have much to be thankful for. But right this moment I'm thankful that I can carry on my grandmother's traditions. I miss her more on Thanksgiving than any other day of the year.


142. memories of Thanksgiving with Ma and Grandad and all the family
143. memories of Aunt Ene's laughter
144. memories of seminary Thanksgivings with Julia
145. memories of a Thanksgiving wedding
146. cooking lessons from two grandmas who loved to cook
147. Ma's cornbread dressing
148. Mashed potatoes and giblet gravy
149. Crescent rolls dripping with butter
150. Turkey roasting in the oven
151. pumpkin pies on the cabinet
152. pecan pies on the cabinet
153. baking pies with the girls
154. spilled milk
155. delight in Flower's eyes as she tasted the batter
156. intensity in Jewel's eyes as she sets about "getting it right"
157. pride on their faces as they look at what we've done
158. the blessing of having more than we could possibly eat
159. 17 friends and family gathering around the table
160. grocery delivery
161. hot showers
162. autumn breezes
163. my cup of English tea
164. delicious aromas filling the house
165. making memories for my girls
166. gathering for Bible study
167. the confidence that God can handle my questions
168. the time I spend with God looking for answers
169. the growth as I grapple with the questions
170. the joy as God answers my questions
171. the gentleness of his answer...even when the answer is harsh
172. memory verses to transform me
173. sermons to challenge me
174. Godly dreams for the future
175. anticipation
176. more to come....

IOW--Faith

Note today In Other Words is being hosted at Sting My Heart Please visit to see others' comments on today's quote.

"Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time."
~ Oswald Chambers ~

Jewel's memory verse a few weeks ago was Hebrews 11:1

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

It was a joy to hear my four year old walking around saying, "now fayfe is..." If you ask her what the verse means she will say "knowing Jesus is right." That is not exactly what I taught her, but that is the essence she was able to grasp. And as she grows up I pray that she will continue to believe that.

Faith is a choice. But it is also acting on that choice. My pastor reminds us frequently that if what we believe is not changing our behavior then we really don't believe it. And it is so true. I can say I choose to have faith, but if I'm not acting upon it then it is just words. This is important because James 2:14 cautions that faith without action is dead! I must make the deliberate choice to pattern my actions after the One who I say I believe. Faith is making the conscious choice "today I believe that Jesus/God is right" and then allowing the Holy Spirit to mold me more into God's character. I may not understand how His character is built in me, but as long as I know Who is at work then I will be transformed. And the transformation leads me to a greater understanding and greater faith. That is one of the best things about faith, it is a full circle. I don't have to wait until I understand. Instead I have to act and trust, and through that I will understand more and more. And then be able to act and trust in even more confidence. And on and on and on.

So do you have faith? Do you believe "Jesus is right?" If so, act in confidence like it is true. If not, I pray today is the day you find that confidence and make the deliberate choice to follow Him.
God Bless you for reading!

More gifts

126. Children's Cough medicine
127. Little arms that reach up in trust for Mommy to make it better
128. Aloe filled tissues
129. Sleep
130. Rest
131. Disney videos to entertain sick kids
132. Veggie Tale videos to entertain when Disney is getting irritating
133. Safe arrivals from out-of-country business trips
134. Belgian chocolates, from Belgium :)
135. Being asked to walk difficult paths of life with friends
136. ...And being able to share the wisdom learned from those walks with others
137. Friends to ask to struggle through hard times with us
138. Email to stay in touch with old friends
139. Computer programs to make Christmas cards with
140. 285 families on a Christmas card list
141. Fun afternoon with DH making that card and reminiscing about friends
142. More to come...

Awareness

First, thank you to those who responded to my previous post. I hate to sound so whingy, it is just sometimes hard to articulate what answers I'm seeking. I'm glad the Holy Spirit knows what my heart needs and continues to work, even as I question how, lol. I took a couple of days off of the written study to just seek God. No answers yet, but that is really okay. I'd rather just be able to state the questions. I find I often learn more in classes that I don't totally agree with the material, because I seek more. And it isn't that I don't necessarily agree with the material, I just really don't like the more academic fashion of presenting it and so I'm fighting it. In discussion with a few other people in the class, they are not really happy with the written presentation either. So at least I'm not alone.

On a much better Bible Study note, my ladies study on Friday was AWESOME! It is so amazing to see how God laid out and prepared this study for us. Two months ago I just jotted down nineteen "topics" and chose one verse that spoke to the topic and one quote that related somehow. The task was each week to just wait for God to speak on the topic and then come and discuss. The topics seemed disjointed and thrown together. But every week, without fail, the discussions have been amazing. The struggles that people are talking about in their lives or in the lives of their friends are exactly on topic. And we are seeing God mightily at work.

The topic this week was "awareness" and the verse was

"He pays even greater attention to you, dow to the last detail--even numbering the hairs on your head!" Matthew 10:30, from the Message version

We were talking about the attention God pays to us, and if that is frightening or reassuring. We also talked of when we are most aware of God and when we are least aware of God. There were some "AHA" moments during the study when God made Himself very apparent. A good discussion of how we should react (and honesty about how we often react) when God brings to our attention/makes us aware of the sin in our life followed. It was incredible. I love being a part of a study when the walls are broken down and there is honest evaluation, application and accountability. This group is reaching that level of trust. I can't wait to see what God will do next.

And isn't it ironic, just as I'm struggling with what does the Holy Spirit really do in my life---He breaks through and moves in the study I'm leading. I don't believe in coincidence. I believe that it is a God-incidence. And I'm sure the two lessons will soon become more apparent how they fit together. That is, if I keep seeking to be aware of God in my life.

Struggling with a Life in the Spirit

No, not necessarily my life in the Spirit, but this Bible Study that I am currently enduringstudying. I try not to be negative about the way studies go, but I am really struggling here. So, maybe by blogging it out, I'll find the answers I'm needing. I'll welcome feedback, but you may also feel free to skip this post as it is rambling and self-serving.

OK, the deal is that I am participating in this study. It is a LifeWay study and I was incredibly excited because the other LifeWay studies I have done have majorly changed my life (think Henry Blackaby Experiencing God and all the Beth Moore studies). I have needed to just be taught for a while, and now I have the opportunity. And although I am learning, it is more from arguing with the study than absorbing from it, if that makes any sense. And I am frustrated. But I'm more frustrated with last night's/week's study. (Note: we have the weekly quizzes ahead of time and since they are taking me longer than the 10 minutes or so in class, I'm doing them ahead).

Last week's topic was "A New Creation" and is talking about the part in redemption that the Holy Spirit plays. The question was posed,

"In this unit we focused more on Jesus than on the Holy Spirit, so it may surprise you to realize we considered at least 8 activities of the Spirit! In the short blanks, name as many of the activities as possible."

At best I could come up with 7 out of the study, and I really think 2 of them were stretching it but I did copy the list of six from the book. I listed: conviction, justification, regeneration (the author uses this interchangeably with redemption), forgiveness of sin, faith (as in empowering a person to believe), and repentence. I added the incarnation because without that the work would not have been able to start in me. I suspected that the 8th was empowering/enabling us to serve, but can't really find where he says that in the study. If I had just brain-stormed activities of the Holy Spirit my first would have been conviction followed by intercession for me at the throne of Christ. So far, intercession has not come up in the book (but we are only on week 4 of 10). I was NOT confident in any of my answers.

So class time comes. The pastor says that we are going to brainstorm these together (in other words, he didn't find 8 either, lol). But when it came time to consolidate our lists he asked for "six (not eight) core activities of the Holy Spirit." The list was put up: Incarnation, Enabling of Jesus' ministry, Sacrifice of Jesus', Resurrection, Conviction, Regeneration. He asked if we are all happy with the list. There is an uncomfortable silence. He asks again. I'm not comfortable so I speak up. I express that "maybe it is splitting hairs" but I have a problem with four of the six core activities of the Spirit relating only to Jesus and being already accomplished. I see the Holy Spirit living and working today, and this seems incongruent. He pointed me to an activity in the book which paralleled five activities of the Spirit in Jesus' life with mine (Jesus' birth parallels my new birth, Jesus's empowerment to serve parallels my service, Jesus' resurrection parallels my eternal life, etc). He contends that the activities in the Jesus life are the same as in our life. I could have pointed him 8 pages further in the book where my list came from, but I didn't because that wasn't the point. And if Jesus' birth parallels my new birth which comes by conviction and redemption, why are Conviction and Regeneration separated from the Incarnation? He asks if I'd be happier saying "significant activities" instead of "core." *shrug* It doesn't change my struggle that much. (Aside: AARGH! No wonder Christians can't agree on doctrines of the Holy Spirit, we can't even agree on the terminology.) Anyway, obviously, I still was not convinced, but no one else is talking so I shut up. And we talk about the Holy Spirit's role in Jesus' life and if Jesus needed the Spirit, who are we to say we can go it without the Spirit's help. And I see the point, but I'm left, wanting....something.

I KNOW the Spirit is alive and at work in me. I hear the daily/hourly/sometimes minutely voice of conviction in my life. I know that is the work transforming me to be more like Christ. I know that when I don't have a clue how to pray, the Spirit knows how and does pray. I know all of this. I can't tell you how I know anymore than I can tell you how I know that my children love and trust me. I just know it. And I want to know how to connect with that more. It is not that I don't believe that the Spirit was an integral part of the life of Jesus. I do. But I find it tedious to separate in such an academic sense what was the work of Jesus and what was the work of the Spirit. And maybe that is my struggle, I don't need to separate Jesus from the Spirit, I just need to learn more about the spirit at work in my life. I don't even know how to ask the questions, I just know I need something else.

See the struggle? I can't even articulate it. Which is sooo frustrating. So here is my question for you (since you got this far): In your life what are the core activities of the Spirit and how does that play out for you? Maybe by hearing your experiences I can separate from the academic study and just relate to the Spirit living in me. Thanks for staying with me!

More Gifts

66. Crisp autumn mornings
67. walks around the lake
68. teaching Jewel and Flower about God's creation
69. cloudless skies
70. thunderstorms, rare occurence that they are
71. rainbows
72. gold and red leaves on the sidewalk
73. daffodils and tulips under the earth...
74. ....and then bursting forth Spring with colour
75. wedding vows
76. wedding bands
77. commitment
78. the past 11 years
79. dreams for the years to come
80. Education opportunities
81. Teachers and professors who helped shape who I am
82. The privilege of being my children's teacher
83. Sonlight curriculum
84. Jewel writing her name for the first time
85. The joy on her face as she accomplished her task
86. Children's Stories
87. Goodnight Moon
88. Dr. Seuss
89. Caddie Woodlawn
90. Five Little Peppers
91. Beatrix Potter
92. *the Jesus book* (Jewel's first Bible)
93. VeggieTale videos
94. Disney videos
95. an enchanted look on Flower's face as she watches
96. Books to read...for mommy
97. The Classics (esp. Jane Eyre)
98. Authors who feed my soul...
99. Dee Brestin
100. Philip Yancy
101. Beth Moore
102. Les Hughes
103. Henry Blackabe
104. Max Lucado
105. Sight
106. Hearing
107. Touch
108. Taste
109. Smell
110. Rasberry candles burning
111. Wind on my face
112. Sunshine
113. Flowers blooming
114. Lavender brusing against me
115. Honeysuckle
116. Chocolate
117. Fresh ground coffee
118. grating nutmeg
119. children's laughter
120. church bells
121. the quiet of the early morning
122. stitches that line up
123. gifts to stitch and give
124. secret Santa pals
125. friends to help keep the surprise
126. More to come....

IOW---Gifts

"No gift unrecognized as coming from God is at its own best... when in all gifts we find Him, then in Him we shall find all things."
~ George MacDonald~

I love giving gifts. I love finding the *perfect* gift for someone especially when it is serendipity since shopping is not my thing. I love stitching a pattern for someone that I know they will love. I love wrapping it with care and lots of ribbons and I love, love, love the joy I get when someone opens up the gift. I love gift giving. Some of my friends say that I am, well gifted, at gift giving.

But it hasn't always been that way. There was a time when I faced with dread any occassion that required a gift. So, what changed? I did. My reason for giving gifts changed. I stopped looking at giving gifts as an obligation and began to see it as a privilege. I began to see that giving gifts was sharing a part of what God gave me with others. I began to realize that giving a material gift from my heart was giving a part of myself and my God to another person. And in that change joy of sharing took over.

The gifts may have been the same. But the attitude they were given with changed. And therefore the giver of the gift was changed. And I've come to realize that it is me, the giver of the gift, who must first recognize that it comes from God for it to be at its best.

The receiver may not even know God yet and therefore cannot begin to fathom to the true breadth of the gift. I think of a family member who gets angry when we give him a gift--each year saying don't give me anything else. Not yet a Christian, he only sees the obligation and not the gift. My husband and I discuss, should we stop? But we feel that gift giving is one of the few ways we can share our heart with this person. So *we* keep giving, praying with each gift he'll see the heart behind the gift not the gift itself. The receiver may not want to see God. I think of a dear friend for whom I stitched a one-of-a-kind creation. When she cut me out of her life because of the reflection of Christ that she no longer wanted to see, she tossed it in the garbage. She totally understood that a gift was a from God and could not have it in her life. I pray for her that she will come to understand you can throw away the gift, but you can't throw away the God who gives the gift.

So, I keep giving gifts. Because God has shown me that giving gifts is an extension of giving Him. I pray as I affix those pretty bows to gifts that the presentation will bring beauty into their life. I pray that the gift inside will encourage the receiver. But most of all, I pray that they will see my God, the giver of all good things, in the person who gave them the gift. And then I sit back and allow God to give me the joy that comes from sharing.


Go here to see what other Christian Women are saying regarding this quote on their blogs.

1000 Gifts

Ann V at Holy Experience of Listening, has begun a series of 1000 gifts and invited other bloggers to join her. What a lovely way to usher in the holiday seasons. So here is my first entry of gifts where God has blessed me. I'll try to post on Thursdays.

1. DH who loves me
2. Jewel
3. Flower
4. Extended Family
5. Church Family
6. IRL Friends
7. Computer Friends
8. Shelter
9. Food
10. Warm Sweaters
11. Shady hats
12. Shoes
13. barefeet in green grass
14. Listening to Jewel pray
15. Listening to Flower "amen"
16. Freedom to worship
17. Freedom to speak
18. Freedom to travel
19. Just Freedom
20. Ladies Bible Studies
21. Harvest time
22. Cotton bales
23. Freshly cut wheat
24. a peahen in the garden
25. ducks on the lake
26. Baby swans growing their white feathers
27. elegance of the blue heron
28. Girls' dancing
29. giggling
30. cuddling
31. tugged ears
32. hugged necks
33. kissed cheeks
34. a child's trust
35. Forgiveness
36. Discipleship
37. Sanctification
38. GRACE
39. Cross Stitch Crazy message board
40. quilt patches
41. Stitching floss
42. Creativity
43. a warm kitchen
44. Bread baking
45. garlic cooking
46. soup in the crockpot
47. travel
48. German Alps
49. Tuscany
50. Stockholm
51. Prague
52. Scottish Highlands
53. and the Lowlands
54. Teachers of Scripture
55. Pastor Bill
56. Pastor Charlie J.
57. Brother Charlie S.
58. Brother Scotty
59. Pastor Mike
60. Jack M.
61. Dean Anne
62. Worship Leaders
63. Music teams
64. Organ music
65. Praise music

SBQ---Flossy Inventory

Today's SBQ was suggested by Jan
(http://www.alpinemeadow.com/stitchery/weblog/index.html) and is:

How many different brands of "complete" embroidery floss sets do you own? How do you keep track of it? (i.e., spread sheet program, index cards, palm pilot, etc.)

The permalink to this post is:
http://blondelibrarian.net/stitching/archives/2006/11/about-floss/

I own a complete set of DMC and near complete set of Six Strands Sweet, and a nice start on the WDW and GAST. I keep excel spreadsheets of the total collection and how many of each colour I have. Those spreadsheets are then kept on my Palm Pilot so I have a quick guide always with me if I happen upon a good shopping opportunity. lol

Goals and WIPs

November goals:
Stitching and Quilting
1. Start and finish 5 Hinzeit State blocks for Xmas gifts
2. Complete all states on ALTWL thru Oklahoma
3. Finish and mail ornament for exchange
4. Complete 3 table runners for gifts
Personal
1. Keep up with Life in the Spirit, including memory verses
2. Order ETC and Singapore Math books (next level)
3. Write Christmas letter and design card
4. Host Thanksgiving dinner (for 17)

In a quick recap of October goals I did finish Stef's NRR, I finished all of Preamble Sampler (not just the stripes), I finished and sent off two quilts, I started the writing curriculum with Jewel (she wrote her name for the first time today!) and I blogged regularly although not 3 times a week. I haven't been walking as much as I had hoped due to weather. I'm going to get better at in-home exercise when we can't get out.


And here is a finish (the Christmas ornament for my 12 Days of Christmas pal) and a Work in Progress (America Land That We Love). This is my focus piece until it is done!

IOW--Seed Planting

"Just as an inferno begins with but a spark, a field grows vast and plentiful from the sprinkling of seeds"
~ Stephanie Fries ~
Steph's Poetry Corner

I am very blessed. As I look back through generations of my family, there is a strong line of faith. My mother's grandmother taught her about God. My Dad was taught by his parents who were taught by my grandmother's parents who were taught by their parents. I can confirm at least four generations of belief that distilled down into my Dad teaching me. With this quote I've been wondering about the person who taught my great-great-great grandfather about faith in God? Did they have any idea the impact they would have on generations to come? That sharing of the Truth has led to generations of belief. I get to reap the benefit of that. My harvest is sweet because I didn't have to experience a lot of difficulty in coming to Faith. I saw it lived out in front of me, I accepted it as truth and I acted upon it for myself. I am so thankful to the people who planted those early seeds of faith in my family. I am part of their harvest. The harvest was not limited to family either. My great-grandfather was an elder in the church and from what I hear a pillar of a community of faith. My grandmother literally loved hundreds of kids into the kingdom (her children's friends and then her grandchildren's friends). My parents taught Sunday School and impacted the lives of the youth of the church. And, now, the harvest still grows.

I, in turn, have the joy and the responsibility to carry on the harvest. Sitting with Jewel each morning reading a Bible Story and teaching a weekly memory verse that I pray will be the foundation of her faith. I pray that these seeds will grow deep and she will cling to Scripture in the days to come when life gets harder. Taking Jewel and Flower to church, *singing God* together, giving money to God, going to Sunday School and teaching them how to love the body of Christ---seeds we are planting and praying grow into a harvest in their lives. How I live my life today waters those seeds in my children. I pray that a good harvest grows, devoid of weeds that could choke out the Truth. I pray that they will accept Faith in Jesus for themselves and will go on to plant seeds in their friends lives and eventually, if God allows it, their children's lives. The generations of faith continuing from early plantings.

Isn't God good?

For other writer's reflections on this quote visit here:

Monday Menu Planning

Well, I have been participating without posting for a couple of weeks, and this is really helping me enjoy cooking again. So, I guess I'll post my menu for the week in participation with Org Junkie

Monday: Tagliatelli with Pork in Marscapone Sauce, Salads
Tuesday: Greek Chicken, Steamed Carrots, Greek Salad
Wednesday (Bible Study night): Savoury Triangles and Crisps
Thursday: Chile Macaroni
Friday: Rosemary Pork Tenderloin and winter squash
Saturday: Dinner out
Sunday: Split Pea Soup, Homemade Bread

Remember Remember the 5th of November

Yesterday was Guy Fawkes Day. It is traditionally celebrated with bonfires and fireworks. Our family went to the firework display last night. Jewel was totally enthralled. Flower giggled and pointed for the first ten minutes, then put her thumb in her mouth, tugged her ear and gave that decidedly "now I'm bored" look. But she snuggled into the pram and was content for the rest of the show and the walk home. It was a lovely evening. Not so lovely were our idiot neighbours setting off fireworks in their back garden 1 foot from our fence and 3 feet from the girls bedroom window, two nights in a row immediately after I put the girls to bed (and that was well after 9:30!) *sigh*

But you really have to love the freedom you live in when a would-be traitor is celebrated with his own day 300 years later. lol!

Growing in Christlikeness

The Life in the Spirit study this week asked us to list 5 ways that the people who knew us best would say our life reflect Christlikeness and the 5 ways that it least reflected Christlikeness. Although I struggled with ways I do reflect Christ, I think that God showed me areas that by His Grace I'm faithfully trying to reflect Him. (Un)fortunately I could have listed many more than five areas that I don't reflect His likeness. And I find that a mixed blessing. Because the more I seek to emulate Him, the more I see that I don't. In an odd way, seeing the areas that God is refining in me is the direct result of seeking a Christ-like life.

Anyway, then the study did the unthinkable. It asked us to ASK the people who knew us best to answer this question for us. Instinct is to run, hide, ignore the question (and to be fair more than half the class did ignore the question). But being the student-who-can't-break-the-rules-no-matter-how-uncomfortable type person that I am, and because my husband was sitting 3 feet away doing the same study, I asked. And he reaffirmed what God was telling me and even added a couple of encouragements that I would have never used to describe myself. And, he affirmed the areas of weakness as well. He graciously only mentioned two areas that he felt I did not reflect Christ (they were my one and two as well), but it was so much harder to hear him say them than for me to acknowledge them on paper. OUCH! But I am more determined to turn those areas over to God.


The study went on to talk about people who we admire for their walk. And it asked the question in terms of respecting or acknowledging their moral approach to life (bad choice of word but I'm too lazy to go get the book). The word that struck me was moral. And I began to ask myself, "who serves as a moral compass for me?" Who do I look at when I am struggling with the correct path to take for guidance. I mean tangible, *I've walked this path and made this choice* guidance not just Scripture guidance. Because, although I am thankful for the Spirit in me and the still small voice of God guiding me, I need real, touchable people I can learn from as well. And, as has happened a few times in the last weeks, I have been reminded I need to cultivate those people in my life. My iron has moved away and cannot sharpen by telephone as well as in person. I need that person in my life. And I'm praying for opportunities to develop that kind of accountability in friendship.

Challenging stuff. Stay tuned for more of the journey. And please, keep praying.

What's in a Name--SBQ

Today's SBQ was suggested by Lee (http://lakestitcher.blogspot.com/) and is:

How did you decide on the title of your stitching blog? Was it random, or does it have a special meaning to you or about you?

The permalink to this post is: http://blondelibrarian.net/stitching/archives/2006/11/whats-in-a-name/

This is timely since I have had several people ask in the last week what my title means. Since this blog was never meant to be exclusively about stitching, wanted something that denoted speech that could cover lots of topics. Monologue seemed to fit at the time (although now I see it more as a Dialogue lol). Miriam Pauline is the name I've written under for some time. It honors my grandmothers (Mary and Pauline) and hearkens to the heritage they left me.

IOW: Scratches of Love

"Like the proud mother who is thrilled to receive a wilted bouquet of dandelions from her child, so God celebrates our feeble expressions of gratitude."
~ Richard Foster~

She was four years old.

She was at granddad's house.

He had a brand new car.

She had a nail.

And she scratched her name on the back of the car.

She ran to show granddad her act of love.

Her parent's freaked out.

But granddad swept her up in his arms and hugged her and exclaimed, "she's four years old and she can write her name."

He didn't see it as destruction---he saw it as love and accepted it as such.

This story was told at my grandfather's funeral in 1996. I was 28 years old. After the service, my great aunt came to me and said, "we still have that car." My grandfather had given her to car to use twenty years before but it was always a "loan." She was not to sell it. Twenty-four years my grandfather kept that bouquet of dandelions. Twenty-four years kept that signature. Twenty-four years.

And so it is with God. He stores up our bouquets of love and cherishes them. He chooses to forget our sins and he chooses to keep the love. Go offer Him some love expression today.

A Life Lived Resentfully?

Thank you for your encouragement yesterday. I find myself more and more aware of the line between being faithful to share my journey and being prideful of that journey. It is encouraging that some of you find my sharing a help in your own journey. That is certainly my prayer. (And, I must consider the source in the person who questioned my motives. This is a person who seems to resent anyone doing anything that brings joy or fulfills dreams.) I know that about this person, but I must be cautious not to just discount the teachable moment as her rubbish when it could be God's small voice.

Resentment is a funny thing (funny--hmmm, not funny---ha ha). This week the son of one of my friends asked his mom "Do you live your life resentfully?" After establishing that he did in fact mean resentfully and not regretfully, they have had an on-going discussion about this. And she posed the question to some of us on a cross stitch board I frequent. The answers were interesting and in the same theme of no because of understanding God's role in life or the brevity of life or what is important. But it got me to thinking why anyone would live their life resentfully.

The aforementioned person who is resentful could trace much of her resentment back to unfulfilled dreams and circumstances she would say were beyond her control. And although the circumstances might have been beyond her control, she chose to be bitter and to give up on everything rather than face the situation. As a result she has lived for 20+ years in resentment and bitterness. Another friend would say that someone else's choice has given them the right to be resentful. But for 15 years she has chosen to not forgive and to resent anyone who points her to forgiveness. I have friends who resent my ability to travel the world, even when they will admit in the next breath that they choose to not travel in order to do other things. But their feelings go beyond wishfulness to resentment (in one case to the point that she told me she doesn't read my Christmas letters because she hates to see where I've been). My brother resents that I live overseas, although he adamantly admits he wouldn't want to live anywhere but Texas. He just can't stand that I choose to live somewhere else. He resents anyone who chooses a different path. Why???

I think it is because so many people, on some level, do not trust their own decisions. A life lived resentfully is a life lived second-guessing the choices one has made. My brother chooses to live in Texas but asks "what if?" Friends choose not to travel but ask "what if?" "What if forgiveness was better?" "What if?" Second guessing. And, the truth is in choices about where to live, what to do with time, what to do with money, etc. contentment can come with whatever decision is made. There is no reason to second-guess.

To not live resentfully is to trust yourself and to trust your God with the decisions He leads you to make. I am content with where I am--no matter where I am--because I am content that God will lead me while I'm there. I trust that by His grace and in His blessing I reside. And that can be anywhere in the world and in any circumstance and in any dream.

Does that mean I never look at someone else and wonder what it would be like to have what they have? Of course not! I would love to stitch as quickly as V, but I am content to be me and stitch at my pace. I would love to take gorgeous pictures like M, but I am content to settle for my point and shoot camera. I would love to live close enough to get together with my friends, but I am content that this is where I'm supposed to live. I would love to turn a phrase or challenge like C, or GB, or AME, but I'm content that this is my writing style and that God blesses it. I could resent my friends for having talents that I don't have, but where would that get me? Miserable and paralyzed from using the gifts I do have. Resentment comes from not being content with who we are. Life is too short to life resentfully.

But what about you? Do you live your life resentfully? If you do, why? If you don't, why not? I'm really interested in continuing this discussion. And so is my friend's son...he is tuning in for answers.

The Pharisee in Me

"Oh, Lord, I pray hard on my way
I try to do it every day
A publican to be I try
and beat my breast and sigh and cry
I'm hoping others round will see--
oops--there's the Pharisee in me!"
from The Pharisee in Me by Jill Briscoe

Don't you hate it when God hits you in the heart in your pleasure reading? This poem hit me hard this week. Can't get it out of my mind. I don't want to be a Pharisee. Yet someone close to me asked this week if I blog my journey for me to learn or to show off what I've learned. I pray that it is the former. Forgive me if it is the latter. And if you see the Pharisee in me show up, please love me enough to tell me. I mean it. If you don't point it out to me I might let her take up residency. And she's not welcome here.

Blessings to you all today!

Happy Dance with Me!

I have finally finished Preamble Sampler! I started it in June 2003 and finished it today! I am really pleased with how it turned out.

More Thoughts on the Journey

Last Sunday I was visiting with another lady as we watched the kids in creche at church (nursery for you Americans out there). Anyway, she was telling a conversation with her husband (not a Christian) and how he was offended by something she said illustrated that he was not a believer. He was offended because he said "I never said I don't believe." And she made this most profound statement. She had told him, "I never said you don't believe. But you don't act on that belief or commit to that belief so you are not a believer." How true. Our pastor often says, "If what you believe doesn't change what you do, you don't really believe it." I agree. Ok, I want to agree.

Fast forward a few days. I'm having tea with a friend. We are discussing the sin topic from Bible Study. She was saying that it a hard subject because what is sin to one person may not be to another. I had to disagree. I know that there are behaviors that are considered "grey areas." But, as I told her, God defines sin as missing the mark of His Holiness as He reveals that in our lives and we don't have any need to compare ourselves with anyone else. It is a sin for me to be impatient with my kids, to take my husband for granted, to abuse my body. The specifics of how I do that may be different from how someone else does that. But I think it is a sin for anyone to mistreat the people in their lives and the temple of God . And, I said, the purpose of talking about sin is not to make a list of "this is sin and this is not", it is to be aware of what God is saying to us each individually about the sin in our life. So then we were talking about being honest about the sin in our life. And she says, "I think that just admitting it is sin is what we have to do." I want to agree, because that is easy. But I can't. So I paraphrase what I had heard on Sunday. I can believe that an action is sin for me, but if I do nothing to change that behavior and give it to God, I am not a believer that sin matters. I want to be a believer that sin matters. I want to agree intellectually with God that sin matters. But I also want to agree by changing my behavior. It is difficult, very difficult. It hurts to change, to be refined. But the reward after is more than I can imagine. So how do I change?

Part of that answer came in this week's Life in the Spirit study. Last night we were discussing our responsibilities in a life in the Spirit. We focused on three concepts: we are to grow in knowledge (i.e. know Who God is and what He expects), to yield to His authority in our life and to trust Him. As I apply this to the area of sin in my life I realise I must know what God is naming sin and name it the same, I must yield to His authority to call it sin and to punish the sin, and I must trust that as I give Him those behaviors He will transform me and give me the power to overcome. I don't have to get rid of the sin in my life. He does the transforming. I have to yield to Him and trust Him. The closer I walk with Him, the less enticing walking in my own path becomes. So I see the last couple of weeks as growing in knowledge as He has revealed His position on sin to me. But the coming weeks and months will be the difficult task of yielding and trusting. We'll see what transformations take place.

Stitcher's Question

Today's SBQ was suggested by Carol http://www.carolsxsblog.blogspot.com/) and is:

If you were to come across a sampler chart that caught your eye and appealed to you, would you or would you not stitch it if it had a morbid or "creepy" saying on it? If not, why?

I would stitch it. I view sampler sayings in the same way I view epiteths (which I love to walk through old cemeteries and read). They are both parts of cultural history and reflect a time where talking of death was more accepted because lifespans were shorter. I think preserving the cultural history is important.

IOW---The Me I Planned

"Has someone seen the life I planned?
It seems it's been misplaced
I've looked in every corner
It's lost without a trace..."
~ Beth Moore~
From the poem: "The Life I Planned "

The Me I Planned...
..was to be a corporate attorney in media relations until my media classes soured that plan
..was then to be a Math teacher until student teaching proved classroom management only frustrated me
..used volunteer work in a children's shelter to make a resume' look better

The Me I planned was unmarried...never married...and working full-time in Single's Ministry.

The Me I planned adopted special needs kids.

But God said,

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

And I said, "I want the Life you want for me, Lord."

And God said,

"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

The Me God Planned...
..used volunteer work to awaken a call to ministry to the needy
..was a seminary trained social worker combining His Word with practical help
..was a teacher of social workers, teaching how to interpret and apply the laws on child welfare.

The Me God Planned...
..was to marry the wonderful Christian man that He had prepared for me who would partner with me for a time in Sintle Adult Ministry and would give me the freedom to pursue my gifts.

The Me God Planned...
..had a long wait and disappointments before having two beautiful daughters

The Me God Planned...
..home educates those daughters without the class room frustration.
..teaches adult women, both married and single, His Word.

My desires: ministry, children, teaching, law
His delight: ME!

The Me God Planned took all my desires and packaged them better than I could have ever imagined and presented them to me. And, as I delight in the Me He Planned, He is delighted and honoured and glorified.

I am so glad He helped me misplace the Me I had planned.

Some stitchy items

I've been neglectful of posting stitchy items, so here goes:

This week's SBQ was suggested by Vash
(http://seasidestitcher.blogspot.com/) and is:

Which way do you stitch, i.e. do you stitch /// followed by \\\ on top, or the other way around \\\ followed by ///? Are you left- or right-handed and do you think that this affects the way that you stitch?

I stitch \\\ followed by /// or backwards to most people I know. I am right-handed, but I do believe handedness does make a difference. I was taught to stitch by my grandmother who was left-handed and I stitch like she did!

I've been working hard on my Preamble Sampler for me. Here is last week's WIP picture. I've now completed the "long" side of all the stripes and only have 2 more shorter stripes to complete.

Here is the house I stitched for S's Neighbourhood RR. It was my last house to stitch before they come home.

And finally, here is Robin's Season RR. Sorry the picture is blurry.

I've also finished 2 quilts. One should have been given to it's owner yesterday and the other is in the post. Once I have confirmation of arrival, I'll post pics of both. Thanks for looking!

Revamping the Blog

No posts today as I am re-vamping the look. Please excuse the skewed alignment in the side bar. I'm trying to get it fixed. If everything is skewed, Enlarge to full screen and it should even out. Back when the glitches are ironed out.

What is sin?

This is the topic for my Ladies Bible Study this week. Sin. Just a topic for God to flesh out in each of our lives however He wills, and for us to come and discuss it. Sin. Ugly word, uglier consequences. And we all do it. Whether we admit it or not.

I had planned to start my journey of reflection this week just thinking about what sin is and how it affects the world, and later distilling it more into how it affects me. A macro- approach to sin is so much easier than personalising it. But then, I sat in church on Sunday and the worship songs were all hitting home. Tears were streaming down my face. The awesomeness of what Jesus did for me in my sinful state overwhelmed me. As we sang

WHEN I WAS LOST, You came and rescued me;
Reached down into the pit and lifted me.
O Lord, such love,
I was as far from You as I could be.
You know all the things I've ever done,
But Jesus’ blood has cancelled every one.
O Lord, such grace
To qualify me as Your own.

There is a new song in my mouth,
There is a deep cry in my heart,
A hymn of praise to Almighty God - hallelujah!
And now I stand firm on this Rock,
My life is hidden now with Christ in God.
The old has gone and the new has come - hallelujah!
Your love has lifted me.

lyrics by Kate and Miles Simmonds

I was overwhelmed. I was as far from Him as I could be. And somedays I still am. That is the essence of sin--it took me as far from Christ as I could be but His sacrifice brought me back. And now on the days (who am I kidding everyday) when sin drives a chasm between me and God the sacrifice is there to keep me within His grasp. The chasm disappears with confession and repentence. Amazing. Amazing grace. And it is for me.

So I'm on a micro-level looking at sin this week. What are the daily sins that are driving that chasm between me and God? I can rattle some of them off easily--not taking care of His temple by eating the wrong foods, idolotry as I put my pride ahead of meeting needs, being easily angered when the girls aren't following my prescribed path (so glad that my heavenly Father is more patient than I am as an earthly mother), not honoring my parents by calling more often, not respecting and loving my husband as a representative of Christ in this family, procrastination on important matters, etc etc etc. I know where I consistently fall on my face. Where I fall short of God's mark (Romans 3:23). But why do I keep going back to the same sins? In a nutshell, because I rarely call them sin. I call them short-comings. I call them mistakes. I call them lack of discipline. I call them habits. But I don't call them sin. And so I don't treat them as deadly to my life as the things I call sin. I would not allow a murderer to live in my house, but I allow myself to be angry and to say hurtful things that in effect murder my children's self-esteem. I would not have a golden idol in my home, but I put myself on throne more times than I want to admit in a day. I am convicted that I must call sin, sin. And I must eliminate it from my life. The habitual things that separate me from God must go. And I've just taken that first step--admitting I have a sin problem. Please pray with me as I seek to be faithful to God and allow Him to remove those things from my life.

It is interesting as I have been writing this entry this week a discussion has been taking place over at GB's site Restoring the Years. A post on a blog we both read described a failing. GB responded to her. But the writer of the first blog wanted grace and compassion, not conviction. She did not see the failing as sin. So GB writes about calling sin, sin. She was writing out of her experience in a situation. But she was writing a divine reiteration to me. Call sin, sin. And in my life I am going to do just that. I'm tired of living in the mire and want to live more victoriously. Hallelujah, He has already given me the new song. Now I want to sing it.

In Other Words--Talking to the Navigator

"It doesn’t matter what is behind you as much as it matters who is beside you."
~ Ellen ~
"Laced with Grace"

My husband is convinced that I am a lousy navigator. He would much prefer Sat-Nav to me when directing us to a new destination. Granted I occassionally say right when I mean left, but I always point in the correct direction. He needs to read the entire direction not just the oral direction and we would get there just fine. I know this is true because all of my girlfriends prefer me to Sat-Nav. I am always the one asked to direct, even if I'm sitting in the back. Why? Because they trust me to communicate to them how to get somewhere in a way that they understand. An informal poll at one time with several friends concluded the same thing--our husbands thought we were bad navigators because they did not listen to us. I guess it really does boil down to how men and women communicate.

As I read this quote and thought about the difficulties my husband and I have when I'm navigating versus the non-difficulties with female friends, I wondered if this is my problem in navigating life. Do I say to God, come beside me and guide me and then only listen with human fallible ears that expect the directions to be in the manner I would give them? If so, I am destined to get lost because if I'm listening to what I expect I will probably miss His voice. Or am I listening with ears that hear the way He communicates? That is what will keep me on the right path.

How do we develop ears that hear God? We are obviously capable of this. In telling the parables Jesus sometimes said, "Let them that have ears, hear" (see Matthew 11:15, 13:9 for example) So it seems like hearing is a choice. I know I choose to hear voices in a crowd that I recognize. I'll tune in to them and exclude the others. My friends and I share a common language of past experiences, expectations, and dreams. That is why we are able to communicate effectively. That is what God calls us to as well. He calls us to choose to hear Him, to choose to listen to His directions. The more time I spend with Him the more I am able to tune into His voice and crowd out all the other noise in my life. The closer I walk with Him the more of a common language we will share. I must choose to get closer to Him, to communicate more like Him and to trust His direction. That is why it matters who is beside me navigating--I choose to let Him navigate and I choose to follow.

A Mishmash of Thoughts

Please forgive this post, because it rambles. There is so much going on in my head, I thought writing would be easy. But instead I'm so full, I just don't know where to start. But God has been working in my thoughts on so many levels I'll see if I can make some sense of it.

Last Saturday my dear husband gave me the most amazing gift--time away with friends at a Women's Bible Conference. He kept the girls and sent me on my way (in fact I left before they even woke up so he had the entire day of stuff with them). It was the first time I had taken away that long with just girlfriends. He and I have left them with a sitter for the day, but I've never done it for me time. And it was amazing. The theme was "Back to the Future" and was looking back on Genesis 1-2 to understand where we came from in order to understand where we were going. There were a few "AHA!" moments for me but the one that continues to resonate with me is this: "Because of the Fall we WILL struggle. It is not that we MIGHT struggle because the punishment of the Fall says we WILL. But the hope and the joy is that the struggles are temporary and will end at our Father's feet." (very close paraphrase) I know in my head intellectually that the Christian life is not a walk in the park. I know experientially that the Christian life is often not easy. But sometimes it is just nice to hear it spoken from a place of knowledge. Sometimes it is good to hear that my experience is normal.
She went on to speak of how in general for women the struggle will somehow be in relationships, because we were made for relationships. Furthermore, in general for men the struggle will be in work because even before the Fall they had the task of working the garden, but the punishment of the Fall was that the work would be toilsome and futile. She reminded us that our husbands, brothers, male friends would often find work tedious and full of futility and that it was NORMAL, but our role as "helper" was to allow them to deal with that tedium. I really needed to hear that. My husband loves his work, but it has been fraught with futility the last couple of weeks. I confess that sometimes tire of being the only person to whom he can/will voice his work frustrations. I needed to be reminded that this is part of my role as his helpmate. And I found myself re-committing my purpose as his wife to being more of a Godly listener. Powerful stuff.
The best part of the day, however, was just hanging out with Godly friends. Here is a picture of 6 of us (the 7th is taking the picture).




(disclaimer: Before you read this paragraph please note that I read about 40 blogs a day and I only mention 4. That does not mean that yours does not fit the category that I am talking about, it just means that I couldn't list them all. Please forgive me.)
The weekly Bible Study this week is on hospitality. I love teaching about hospitality. I love opening people's thoughts up the notion that hospitality is more than preparing a meal or having a party, but it is a welcoming spirit and how we interact with others. I've been thinking about hospitality in terms of this blog. There are some blogs I visit (Shalee's Diner, Holy Experience, AMExpressions, Restoring the Years to name just 4) where I immediately feel at home. I don't have to post and be part of an "inner circle", I don't have to have the same style or thoughts, I don't have to speak that elusive God-language or cross-stitch language, I just have to come and I am totally welcome. I glean wisdom from the ladies and I know that God is blessing me with their words. There are other's that I enjoy what they write but I feel like an outsider looking through a window (if that makes any sense). So what does that mean for this blog? Well it means that I want this to be a place where people find refuge and the encouragement of a fellow journeyman struggling with matters of faith. I hope that no one ever feels like an outsider looking in. So I find myself wondering how can I be "hospitable" in the blogsphere? What is it that makes those sites (and so many others) so appealing to me? Is it the honesty? yes Is it the humor? sometimes Is it that they can bring tears to my eyes with their imagery? sometimes yes But the ultimate reason they are appealing is that they illustrate Jesus. I am drawn because my Savior shines there. He shines when they talk about their marriages, their kids, their struggles, their failings, their successes and breakthroughs. I want Jesus to shine here. I want Him to shine when I talk about Jewel and Flower and the ups and downs of parenthood. I want Him to shine when I talk about His Bible Study that He gives me the privilege of hosting. I want Him to shine when I write of the spiritual lessons I am learning. I want Him to shine when I speak of quilting and cross-stitching and traveling--passions He has afforded me to follow. I want Him to shine. At the end of the day, I don't care if you remember a thing that MiPa said today, but I hope you can say "I saw Jesus in her." To me that is hospitality in a nutshell. And here is fair warning, I am going to become more intentional in allowing Him to shine in this blog. Welcome friends!




Finally, I'm starting a new Bible Study at church. This one I am actually just participating, realizing that the teacher needs to be taught as well. The study is called "Life in the Spirit" and focuses on the workings of the Holy Spirit. Last night was the introductory meeting. I've already started the study and I can already tell that it will be challenging for me. Growing up in a denomination that downplayed the Spirit's role probably has had more impact on me than I care to admit. But last night something the Pastor said (ok I admit it--I can't remember what he said) triggered a memory from my university days. A friend and I were praying as we did every Sunday evening from 10-11. He was telling me about praying with another friend. He said something to the effect that he loved praying with her because it was like the waterfall of the Holy Spirit just fell on him as he listened to her prayers. I loved the thought then enough to store it away. I love the image more now. I want to be experience the waterfall of the Holy Spirit falling in my prayers. And, I'm going to be selfish, I don't want a little mountain waterfall, I want the Niagra Falls or Victoria Falls of the Holy Spirit to crash into my life. I'm excited because I know if I allow that kind of power to be unleashed my life will never be the same. I'm scared because I know if I allow that kind of power to be unleashed Satan will throw everything he can at me to discourage me. So please, please, please pray for me as I do this study. Pray for my spiritual eyes to be opened. Pray for understanding and wisdom. And pray for protection for me and my family that Satan will not thwart what is happening. (An added note, my husband is also taking the course so please pray for him as well).



And finally, finally: WELCOME BABY KEARSYN. My dear blogging friends Vicki and Andy have a new baby girl. Blessings to you and your family!

The Conversation

The scene:
Mom is in the kitchen finishing up dinner. Dad's keys can be heard in the door. Flower and Jewel are building blocks in the living room.

Jewel: Mom, Flower did a no-no behind the chair.
Mom: What did you do (as she goes to living room). (spies the scissors and hundreds of little pieces of index cards bought for memory verses scattered. puts scissors up, picks up paper, slaps Flower's hand once)
Mom: NO NO, you don't take Mommy's scissors.
Flower sits on couch, juts bottom lip out and pouts
Jewel: Daddy, Flower did a no-no come see.
Daddy: What will you say first?
Jewel: Welcome home Daddy, now come see.
Daddy: Is this hair? (pointing to 2 lovely locks of curls under the chair)
Mommy: Looks like hair. Whose hair is this?
Jewel: I don't know.
Mommy: Either you cut Flower's hair or Flower cut your hair (chekcing both heads of curls so thick I can't tell) so you know. Whose hair is this?
Jewel: I don't know.
Daddy: I will spank you if you are lying to me.
Jewel: It's Flower's.
(Mommy slaps Jewel's hand one time for using scissors. Daddy puts Jewel in time out for blaming Flower and getting her in trouble. Jewel experiences grace of not getting punished for lying about whose hair it is).




Back to your regularly scheduled blog.

In Other Words--Growing Plants for God

"These children are the seeds my days plant, the blooms of the next generations."
~ Ann Voskamp ~
"Holy Experience"

I just want to start by saying that I feel inadequate writing on this quote. I read Ann's Holy Experience blog daily and she blows me away with her wisdom. And here I am trying to comment on that wisdom.

Secondly, it is ironic to write about growing children in a week that I said to my husband I have no idea why God entrusted these kids to me, I'm not very good at this motherhood thing. (nothing major this week, just normal toddlerhood and preschool issues). I was at my wits end Friday when I saw the quote for the week and laughed aloud.

All that being said, isn't this a great quote?
I'm a farmer's daughter. I grew up on a cotton farm and I know the ups and downs of planting the seed and waiting for the rain at the right time, and long hours of tilling the land and irrigating the land, and praying the weather stays pretty enough to get the harvest in. I know all of that, and it is a life I did not think I wanted--too hard, too unpredictable, too long. And, yet, this quote says that, basically, we are all farmers tilling the fertile ground of our children's hearts. And I am thrilled to have this life.

Yes, it has lots of ups and downs. The joys of hearing Jewel (my 4 year old) playing church with Flower and telling her sister to hold hands to pray. The elation when I hear them singing praise songs as easily as they would sing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider." The fun we are having learning the memory verses that our part of our home education curriculum every week and the laughter each night as she tries to teach her daddy the week's verse. The ups are great!

Then there are the downs. The kissing the boo-boos and wiping away tears. The laying awake at night when they are sick. The almost constant praying that something I am doing or saying will take hold (and the negative things they may witness won't take hold). The self-doubt when I think I can't do this (and God always reminds me that He can). The worry when they are out of my sight. The fear of what the world may be for them. The downs are scary, but also necessary.

So I didn't want to till the land because it was too hard, too unpredictable, too long of days. And yet I till their hearts and that too is hard, but so rewarding; it is unpredictable, but God knows the outcome; and although the days seem long this time is really so very short. I hope to instill the values and knowledge they need to reap a harvest of a righteous life given to God. What greater privilege could their be. Thank you, Ann, for helping me see that.

"But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree plated by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." Psalm 1:2-3

How do we protect them?

I have been heartbroken over the school shootings in the last week in the US. The one in the Amish community has particulary haunted me. My dear husband and I were discussing it last night and the discussion turned to this being another reason to home educate--we don't have to worry about them losing their life in a school room. But then we discussed, how do we protect them? How do we keep them secure? The danger of this world is everywhere--not just in public or private school rooms.

A reporter said yesterday that the Amish thought they were safe because they withdrew from mainstream society. I don't think that is entirely true. I do believe that were insulated from the constant violence that our kids can see in the media. Another reporter said about how frightening for those little girls, that they could not even pretend it was a movie because they hadn't seen one. There is no way they could comprehend what was happening. But their safety could not come from being set apart from mainstream culture.

Their security comes from the reason they set themselves apart in the first place. Their security comes in the faith and belief in God. They chose the lifestyle they led not to protect their kids from harm but to serve God in the best way that they understood Him to lead them, as did the generations before them. And that is where their security lies. And it is where what comfort they will find in the coming weeks lies. God is God and He is in control, no matter how out of control the world around us feels. And clinging to that is the only thing that can keep us sane in an insane world.

And that is the only way we can protect them. We trust God to have the bigger picture. We serve Him and follow His lead. We teach our kids that security is in Him alone. And we pray. We pray like we've never prayed before that He will provide their earthly security and ultimately that they will accept Him as Savior so He can provide their eternal security.

My heart goes out to all of the families touched by school violence last week. I'm praying for them that they find God's peace and God's security in and through the tragedy.

Security--where is it

I've been thinking a lot about security for this week's Bible Study, just not blogging much, yet. Mostly I've been asking God to show me where I place my daily security. I know my eternal security is in Jesus' nail-scarred hands, but do I live in that everyday? More and more I see that my daily security is in my husband, my kids, my abilities, our retirement savings, etc etc etc. I need to seriously think about how to align my daily living security with the Saviour I know holds it. More soon, but just something to think about.

In Other Words: My Partner and My Friend

"A husband is a guy who tells you when you've
got on too much lipstick and helps you with
your girdle when your hips stick."
~ Ogden Nash ~

I have a wonderful husband. He is my friend, my partner, my confidante, my lover, and my sanity at times. He is a great father. He is our provider and our leader. He is also very private and would prefer that I never write about him. Ahem. So instead of writing a story about him, I'll write a prayer for him.

Father,
Thank you for providing such a God-centered man to lead our family. Thank you for giving him a level-headedness in times of trouble. Thank you for making him compassionate toward others and passionate toward his family.

I pray that you will protect him today. Protect him as he commutes to and from work in order to provide for the family you gave him. Protect him as he makes decisions that affect the company he works for and the people who work under him. Protect his integrity as he meets with people, and in the business dealings that always ask a person to push the line, even slightly. Protect his Christian walk, that the people around him will see You at work in him and want some of what he has. Protect his peace if decisions are not as he would have them.

I pray that you will bless him today. Bless him with co-workers who will have kind words. Bless him with time to get away from the hurry of work and regroup. Bless his "iron sharpening" time today that both he and his friend may be challenged and encouraged. Bless him with a welcoming home when he returns and not the chaos of toddlers run amok. Bless him with a feeling of satisfaction that this was a day well-done, and well-served.

Thank you for the Blessing of him. In Jesus' precious and loving name....Amen

October Goals

Review of September goals:

Family:
1. Start Pre-K with dd4 done see here for homeschooling updates
2. portraits of the girls decided to wait since we got good family shots in Germany
3. pictures sent to family in the States sent
4. Enjoy a quality family holiday :-) done!

Personal:
1. Prepare for leading Patriarchs Bible Study not beginning this study til 2007
2. Participate in Life in the Spirit Bible Study (with DH:-)) begins October 11
3. Blog at least 3 times a week yes
4. Write at least 1 day a week yes

And now for October goals:
1. Finish Stef's Neighbourhood RR
2. Finish stripes on Preamble Sampler
3. Blog about current Bible Study topic at least 3 days a week
4. Introduce writing curriculum into daily homeschool plans
5. Finish 2 quilts
6. Participate in Life in the Spirit Study
7. Walk minimum of 2 miles a day 5 days a week

SBQ of the week: Mistakes

Today's SBQ was suggested by Sharon
(http://crossstitchobsession.blogspot.com/) and is:

When you find yourself making a lot of mistakes in various stitching projects do you find it better to muddle your way through or do you take a brief break from stitching? If you do take a break, how long do you take?

I find most of my mistakes occur late in the day when I'm tired or when the chaos level with the children is too high to concentrate. So in both of those cases, I find it necessary to take a break and come back to it later. Usually later in the day (if it's due to chaos) or the next day (if it's due to tiredness) but soon enough that I haven't forgotten where the mistake was to begin with. lol

Awesome Discussion

We just had an awesome time of discussing materialism in our Bible Study time. It was such a blessing. Lots of good questions. Even more heart-felt searching. We talked about where our attitudes about money came from. We discussed how we can instill in our children proper attitudes towards stuff. We prayed for our children as they live in a peer-pressured society to be able to have appropriate appreciation for what they have and God-centered desires. We discussed the heart of why we are to not seek more:

"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have because God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" Hebrews 13:5

This quote will be the perfect bridge into next week's discussion on security. So much of our pursuit of stuff is out of insecurity. But God has commanded us to be content because He is constant in our lives. Amazing!

We spent a significant amount of time discussing how to be with friends who are at different places than us regarding acquiring things. We all agreed that prayer is the first and foremost response. One of the ladies said that she had recently dealt with an issue of whether to say something to a friend about a sin issue in the friend's life. Overwhelmingly she has been reminded that she needs to pray. "If I'm willing to say something to her, shouldn't I also be willing to spend an hour on my knees praying for her?" What a question. I'm not sure I am always willing to spend the imploring time on my knees. And if I'm not willing to do that, I should not be speaking "for" God. But we also all agreed that sometimes the Holy Spirit so clearly leads us to be "Nathan's" to a friend's "David" and speak boldly and responsibly about behavior. In those cases, we must be willing to face that if the friend is not willing to hear, the friendship may be strained or end until they are able to hear what was said. Courageous friendship.

We also spent a significant amount of time discussing how we may impose on others in our generosity. Thank you for your comments on that, I thought I might be out there in left field, but from comments and responses today, I don't think I'm alone out there. In offering to give to others sometimes it is just that, generosity, and there is nothing wrong with that. But, sometimes, it is perpetuating a lifestyle choice that says to others "this is the way you should live, where you should go, where you should eat, how you should celebrate, etc." Those lifestyle choice may be right for me, but if I set it up as the expectation and I'm "giving" it to others I may take away their ability to joyfully reciprocate in their own way. It is subtle. And it may not be the case in all offers of sharing. But I think God is telling me to be careful what messages I'm sending unintentionally. Why does this walking a Holy Life have to be filled with so many subtleties?

Finally the discussion turned to how do we make this work in marriages, when two people come with differing opinions about money and saving and possessions. We spent time praying for our husbands as they provide for our families (everyone present was a SAHM) and for ourselves to be supportive as they lead our families. It was a sweet time. I'm looking forward to future discussions in this vein.

note: photo from http://morguefile.com

Generous to a Fault

Well, no one took on the question of do we say anything to a friend/sister in Christ struggling with shopping/accumulating stuff. I guess I'll just have to keep praying on that one.

Today, I want to briefly mention something else that has come to mind as I've prayed over this topic this week. Can we be materialistically motivated in our generosity? Stay with me for a minute, because I don't know the answer. But I've been thinking how I have been guilty of saying to friends who have less monetary flexibility than me to just come and do (whatever) and I would pay for it. I am happy to share my monetary blessings. Often this is said when I am really wanting to do something and someone else is really trying to live within their budget. So I get company and they get to go do whatever. It should be a win-win. But is it? I wonder if my willingness to share comes across as flaunting. I wonder if I should instead choose activities that just don't cost money--still get to be with a friend but they are not put in a place of accepting a gift or refusing to go.

The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines materialism as

"Main Entry: ma·te·ri·al·ism Pronunciation: m&-'tir-E-&-"li-z&m Function: noun

2 : a preoccupation with or stress upon material rather than intellectual or spiritual things

Even in sharing what I have, maybe I am putting stress on the fact that I have it and not looking at what that may or may not do to the spirit of my friend. Something to ponder as I strive to seek God first, keep the attitude about stuff and money right, and watch Him align the rest of my life.

Blessings my friends. I'll post tomorrow after our Bible Study discussion.

Finally a Stitching Picture

Here is a block I stitched for Robin's Seasons RR:

It is Prairie Schooler--Country Seasons (Autumn, obviously).

"Let's Go Shopping" Not!

A few years ago I remember being in a study with someone who loved shopping, and buying and having stuff. Her love of shopping was becoming a problem in her marriage. So she was asking for help and prayer. She was saying that part of the problem of not shopping was not being able to spend time with a certain friend who often went with her. I remember someone asking her if this friend always bought things when they went and she said the friend rarely bought anything, she was happy to just look. So I remember saying that maybe it was worth pursuing just inviting the friend over for tea, or to go for a walk, or something that did not involve shopping. She was adamant that this was a shopping friend and that the other suggestions were inadequate. The truth is she did not want to stop spending money and accumulating things. She wanted to believe that it was the friend keeping her from stopping but it was her.

A few weeks later I remember being very uncomfortable when invited to go on a shopping excursion to Stoke-on-Trent, the pottery mecca (think Wedgewood, Spode, Portmeireon all at 80% off the prices in the US), because this person was going. I wondered what it said to go along when I knew this was a difficult area for her. In the end, I did go because she was not the person who invited me and because I actually needed a couple of things. But all day long it needled at me as I witnessed her spending more and more on things that she even admitted on that day she did not need.

Does it matter how we behave around our friends in the matters of material belongings? I believe that it does.

Paul cautions us,

“Even if we believe that it makes no difference to the Lord whether we do these things, still we cannot just go ahead and do them to please ourselves; for we must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others---of those who feel these things are wrong.”

My shopping may not be an issue for me, but if shopping is an issue for someone else, do I have any right to participate in the activity in front of them or with them? According to this passage, the answer has to be “NO.” I need to find things to do with them that do not tempt them to step outside the boundaries that God is laying for them. But that is not easy to do. Even in the case above, where the friend had admitted needing help in the area, I found it impossible to say, “Maybe we should do something else.” I was afraid of offending. But that would be the response of a true friend.

It is even more difficult if the person who apparently has an issue with materialism has not invited me into the problem. Then it just appears that I am judging, not helping. So what am I to do? Is it enough to simply avoid the situation? Will there not always be someone else willing to go shopping with them? Then, what? Pray for them? Absolutely, I believe that is the first step. But should I speak up? I don’t know. I welcome your ideas.

In my heart of hearts, I want friends who care enough about me to tell me when I’m falling into a pattern of behavior that is going to hurt me. But that implies close friend. Do I want casual friends doing that? On the surface, not really. But, ultimately if God has led the person to speak, I hope they will be faithful to speak. And I pray that God would also give me a heart to listen. So in that respect, if I feel that God is leading me to say something I would pray that the person would be in a place to hear it. It sounds good on paper, but it is so difficult in reality. What do you think?

Tomorrow: Generous to a Fault?

Blessings...